Week 4: Online Dating

When I decided to start this project, I told myself that no matter what popped into my head, I'd give it a try. I have been sticking to that, and after week 3 was highly slacking, I figured I'd better come up with something extra special to write about for all three of you who read my blog.

So I was reading an article on xojane.com the other day about someone who was dating a guy that they had met online because some algorithm had said they were meant for each other. Apparently, the site was way off, and they had nothing in common. This wasn't the point of the article I had read, but it got me thinking. What kind of people would some online dating website say were perfect for me? My curiosity was piqued, and I was really bored at work, so I decided to find out. Also, I had always held this idea that people who used online dating were somehow different than everyone else, because they couldn't start relationships the normal way. I was a bit prejudiced, and after learning about a few couples I knew that had found each other this way and were happy, I decided to put my prejudices to the test.

I set up my profile at work on okcupid on my cell phone because the website was free and they had a mobile app. I couldn't actually go to the site at school, so I answered all the questions and set up my profile. I added a photo of myself where you couldn't really tell it was me (because to be honest, I was still a little bit embarrassed that I was doing this). Eventually, I ended up with something that looked sort of like this:

Then, all I had to do was sit back and wait for the messages to start coming in. I had given myself a couple of rules for this experiment, and they were as follows:

1. Even though I set my location to Saint John, NB, I had to promise to meet at least one of the people in person when I got home. Otherwise, it wouldn't be like real online dating.

2. No matter what shitty messages I got sent, I had to reply at least once. Maybe they had a reason they sent a message that said "heyy sexy, wut u up2???". If I didn't ask, I wouldn't know!

3. I had to choose at least one or two profiles I found interesting and start conversations with them.

4. I had to hold back the attempt to be witty and sarcastic to the people mentioned in 2. I'm not doing this to make fun of the people that are, I had to keep telling myself.

Then, all of a sudden, I started receiving messages. I quickly realized that there was a problem with being a certain age and a certain type of person in a small city like Saint John. This problem was that inevitably, you realize that you already know half the people on the site. Amusingly enough, however, they didn't recognise me, and I exchanged messages with a couple of men who were treating me like they'd never met me before. Don't worry guys, your secret is safe with me, but you know who you are. :)

That being said, I also received a huge range of emails. Some looked like this:

I did give this guy a chance, but I can't say he really impressed me. After all, we were only a 55% match!

I also got messages like this, feeding my ego with the knowledge that I am "so fine". :D

And my personal favourite, this guy. I tried my best not to be sarcastic with him, but I just couldn't help it at some points. He wanted proof that I lived in Japan, he thought I was making that up so that I didn't have to have coffee with him. As if I couldn't have come up with a better excuse.

So far so good, guy! Your spelling is atrocious, but you seem nice enough. I'm glad I gave you a shot. "apposed" still gets me, though. Apposed! See? I'm being nice so far! We talked about our jobs for a while, then he asked me the dreaded question.

Oh, I've got him now!

That was pretty much how that conversation ended up crashing and burning.

That being said, for all the ridiculousness I entertained on this site, I might have met a few creepers. This guy seems to be really great, and we've been talking back and forth for the last little while! Who knows, maybe he'll be the one I meet up with for coffee once I get back to the port city!

In conclusion, online dating isn't the horrible thing I imagined it to be, and I have learned not to judge anybody for using the service. I don't think I'll be continuing it, but I could actually see myself meeting somebody this way and maybe forming a relationship with them? It's not what I'm looking for right now, but who knows what will happen in the future?

Also, I've decided that match percentages are complete and utter crap. There were people I was a 90% match with who turned me off almost immediately, and people who seemed to be nice enough that I was 99% supposed to be enemies with. 

The final thing I took from this experience is that people need to learn how to spell. Seriously.

Have you tried online dating? Has it worked for you? Do you think I should go out with any of these guys? Let me know. :)